Yoda, grief, and making a decision

Core Article: Yoda, grief, and making a decision

Quote I’m Pondering: “May you listen to the voice within…”

Powerful Affirmations to Inspire: “I am paid well for

Yoda, grief, and making a decision

I read something this week that made me do a complete double-take. You know… one of those “Waaitt WHHAttt?” moments.

In a newsletter I received this week, the author was railing against one of my favorite quotes from Yoda in Star Wars: “Do or do not, there is no try.”

They were saying that it’s a bunch of B.S. That nothing would ever be done if we didn’t try. Ummmm, yeahhhh, no, that’s not the point.

This quote has nothing to do with trying. It has everything to do with making a decision.

Sure, you can try to do something. Yet everything changes when you’ve actually decided you’re going to do it.

I’d go even further and say that deciding is really about giving yourself permission.

Here’s the scene where Yoda’s quote came from:
In Star Wars, Luke is standing there on the ground. He’s attempting to raise his fighter jet out of the swamp. That’s why Yoda calls him out. Not because he’s practicing or trying, but because he’s not fully committed to the outcome internally in his mind and body.

Specifically, Luke says, “I’ll try.”

And Yoda basically says: “No. Decide.”

Now think about your own life or business for a second.

There’s a big difference between:

“I’m trying to build my business.”
vs.
“I’m building my business and figuring it out as I go.”

Let’s look at Alexander Graham Bell. He didn’t “try” to invent. He made a decision, gave himself permission to devote his life to solving problems and discovery.

What matters is not just persistence, iteration, and failing. You can’t have those things unless you have the deeper thing: When you decide to engage fully to accomplish whatever goal you’ve set out for your business/life.

When doing this, language is really important. How you say things out loud AND how you say things INSIDE YOUR HEAD. Yeah, this is also totally important.

If you’re using the word “try” or “trying” in your work/life, you’ve got to look underneath it. In my experience, using that word ultimately means:

I haven’t fully decided yet.
I’m still protecting myself cuz I’m afraid.”
I’m still leaving the back door open for something or someone else.

When you “try” something without making an inner decision, it creates scattered energy. It’s hesitant, and means you’re half-committed, and could mean you’re overthinking instead of deciding and engaging with “it,” whatever “it” means for you.

Every person who has ever created something meaningful has faced this. It’s not just an intellectual decision. It’s also a heart, mind, and energetic decision.

I’ve done this both ways, and I gotta tell you, when I figured out the decision piece, whoa, my life changed.

When I launched my SMA (Soulful Marketing Accelerator) Live course last year, I made the decision that I wouldn’t “try” to do it. (As I’d done tinkering with it many times before.) I decided to launch the course before I completed creating it. Because I wanted to see if there was a market for it. I didn’t want to put in all the hours to create it, and then find out no one wanted it. (That’s another huge lesson as well.) I basically was “building the plane while flying it.” And guess what, it was incredibly successful.

And when you do this, it usually looks more like… You decide, move forward, screw it up a little, adjust, keep going, learn something, and eventually find your footing.

Or, you decide you don’t want to “do that” anymore and shift and change to something else.

Give yourself permission to decide to do something and then do it, even if you don’t have a clue what you’re doing yet. That’s usually how most meaningful things begin. Nobody starts out 100% confident and knowing exactly how everything will turn out.

Maybe that’s what Yoda was really trying to get Luke to understand. Not perfection or instant mastery. More like… stop standing there with one foot in and one foot out of your own life because you’re afraid you might fail. Decide to engage with it fully and then figure the rest out as you go.

Funny enough, grief has been teaching me this same lesson these past six weeks since losing my mom. Some mornings I wake up feeling pretty grounded and clear, and a few hours later, something hits me sideways, and I feel completely untethered again.

After talking with my coach and my therapist weekly… I keep remembering this is what grief actually is. It’s messy, unpredictable, exhausting, and strangely clarifying all at once.

At a certain point, you stop trying to “win” at grief or get through it perfectly and realize the goal is to simply ride the waves as they come. Some days you handle them well. Other days, you get absolutely tossed around like a dinghy in a hurricane.

One day it’s “Ohhh…kay. Got it. I can do this.”

The next, “oh man, this hurts, and I need to ride this grief wave.”

Either way, I’m still here. Still deciding to engage with my life, work, relationships, and the things that matter to me, even while feeling upside down sometimes.

Maybe that’s the real point of all of this.

It’s not about becoming fearless, getting rid of uncertainty, or waiting until you know exactly what you’re doing.

Simply deciding that something matters enough to you that you’re willing to stay engaged with it, learn as you go, screw it up sometimes, adjust, and keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Hands at your back.

Always. 🙂

Shannon

P.S. Before I head out, I owe you an apology for not being in your Inbox last week. I don’t want to make this a habit of not being here each week. I like being something you can rely on, and I promise to keep showing up and doing that from now on. 🙂

Quote I’m Pondering

“May you listen to the voice within the beat even when you are tired. When you feel yourself breaking down, may you break open instead. May every experience in life be a door that opens your heart, expands your understanding, and leads you to freedom. If you are weary, may you be aroused by passion and purpose. If you are blameful and bitter, may you be sweetened by hope and humor. If you are frightened, may you be emboldened by a big consciousness far wiser than your fear. If you are lonely, may you find love, may you find friendship. If you are lost, may you understand that we are all lost, and still we are guided by Strange Angels and Sleeping Giants, by our better and kinder natures, by the vibrant voice within the beat. May you follow that voice, for this is the way—the hero’s journey, the life worth living, the reason we are here.”

~ Elizabeth Lesser, Broken Open: How Difficult Times Can Help Us Grow

Powerful Affirmations to Inspire

“I am paid well for the value I provide.”
“Money flows to me in increasing amounts from multiple aligned sources.”
“My inner world creates my outer success.”

Weekly Photos

So many pictures, so little space and time! 🙂 Since April, we’ve traveled to Austin for a family wedding, and then we went to Carmel, CA for a few days of R&R and Loma Lindia in Southern CA to visit Alice’s parents.

Before we took off on our adventures, I had to get some walks in on the Sacramento Trail, and I ran into this little family of deer. This one just stopped and stared at me. They do that. It’s kind of eerie. They pick their head up and watch you. It’s almost a game, who’s gonna move first? 🙂
There’s Alice and I on a trail at Garrapata State Park in CA. They mark the trails by Gate #. This pic was taken near Gate 7. The coast along Hwy 1 is pretty incredible from Carmel all the way down to Big Sur. I’ve seen nothing like it; maybe the coast of Scotland comes close.
This is a picture from where we had breakfast each morning. The hotel (The Highlands Inn) and restaurant were built right on the coast, so you get some sweeping views of the Pacific Ocean. (not the best pic, yet I always like to give perspective.
I learned this bit of info on our trip – this is a California poppy flower, and it’s actually the state flower. It’s illegal to pick them, so glad I got the inside scoop. 🙂
There’s a pic of Alice hiking down the coast trail. The views were spectacular. Nothing beats walking along oh-so-many coastal trails on Hwy 1.
There’s a sheep farm in Carmel that’s part of the Mission Ranch Hotel and Restaurant. We ate at the restaurant, and you have these wonderful views of the meadow, ocean, and the sheep.
This is my favorite view from the hotel restaurant, even though the pics are not the best (damn reflection), I had to post it cuz you can see the houses nestled in the coastline.

NEW 5/13/26 P.S.S. Personal Invitation – I’m shifting my business a bit this year to focus on marketing and business coaching. Interested in more, schedule a complimentary call with me. 🙂

P.S.S.S. Whenever You’re Ready: Here are 3 Ways I can make an impact on creating greater success in your business using marketing that’s aligned with your mission and values without feeling like you’re selling your soul.

1. Make Money Now Sheet – It’s one of the bonuses in my 7-Step Soulful Marketing System. I wanted to give it to you for free to help you create more success.

2. Love Books Like I Do? – I’m always reviewing the best nonfiction books – Where Buddha Meets Business.

3. Get my proven 7-Step Soulful Marketing System. It gives you the framework you need to implement authentic and connected marketing using online customer experiences and launching your products, services, or courses. It will help you create greater success.

It’s a simple system, especially if you love to read like me. There’s no video or audio. Plus, you get my proven templates, tools, and worksheets, all with tremendous value. And I’m pricing it incredibly low so it can be more accessible to more people. 🙂

Did someone forward this to you? If so, get this eNewsletter regularly with my compliments by clicking this link. And if you’re in the mood to share, simply send this URL to others: https://www.soulfulmarketingsystem.com/soulful-marketing-enewsletter.

I appreciate your sharing. Thank you!

Some legalese: Copyright © 2025 SoulfulMarketing.com All rights reserved. SoulfulMarketing.com is a division of McCaffery Communications LLC. All rights reserved. You may forward this to others. Yet, no reproducing, republishing in any other form or by any other means without written permission.

Let’s Connect on Social Media!
Facebook

Instagram

Please follow and like us: