Are You Still Carrying It?

As I was walking through the woods yesterday, stepping on and around the rocks on the trail, I thought about one of my favorite classic Zen stories. It feels like a good continuation of last week’s eNewsletter, where I wrote about what happens when feelings move through us, and then our thoughts jump in and start building whole stories around them.

Two monks were traveling together and came across a river with a strong current. They also came across a young woman trying to cross the river, and she asked them for help.

The monks looked at each other because they had taken a vow not to touch women. Then, without saying anything, one monk scooped the woman up and carried her gently across to the other side.

They returned to their journey in silence for several hours. Finally, the younger monk couldn’t contain himself and said, “As monks, we’ve taken a vow not to touch a woman. How could you carry her on your shoulders?”

The older monk turned, looked at him, smiled, and said, “Brother, I set her down on the other side of the river. Why are you still carrying her?”

That story hits home for me every time.

Have you ever done this? Carried something in your mind that keeps coming up, and you don’t even realize you picked it up?

It’s interesting to explore what you’ve picked up that you haven’t put down yet. And what keeps happening inside of you because you’re still carrying it?

That’s where it gets tricky for me. The thought machine in my head can stream like Netflix. Some thoughts pass through like clouds. Others I pick up and carry without even realizing it. I wish there were a rhyme or reason to it, but so much depends on where I am physically, emotionally, and energetically.

I can feel this most when I’m out walking, noticing how many rocks have probably been on the trail forever, even though some days I swear they appear out of nowhere just to trip me. It makes me think about how many invisible rocks I’m carrying inside my own head. Old conversations, hurts, and fears. Stories I thought I put down a long time ago.

This is where one of my favorite Melody Beattie stories comes in because it gives this whole idea a physical reminder.

She talks about going to a hardware store or garden store and getting a flat patio stone, then writing on it all the fears, excuses, and old stories that keep you from moving toward the life you say you want. The “I’m not ready yet.” The “what if I fail?” The “what if people judge me?” The “who do I think I am?” All the thoughts that seem so true when they’re living inside your head.

Then you carry the stone with you long enough to feel the weight of what you’ve been carrying.

Now, I’m not sure I’d actually recommend walking around all day with a big patio stone in your bag. Knowing me, I’d probably pull a muscle or knock something over. 🙂

Yet, I love the teaching because it makes the invisible weight visible. It shows you what happens when you keep picking up the same fear, anger, frustration, old conversation, story, and carry it around like it still belongs to you.

Do you still carry what someone said to you years ago, or the decision you wished you’d made differently, or the stories that you keep telling yourself that evoke feelings of grief, regret, fear, or uncertainty? There are so many ways the brain tries to convince us that a feeling is a fact.

From all my research and therapy, I’m finally understanding that “Feelings aren’t facts.” They are just feelings that come up, we notice, feel, breathe, and let them move through us.

This is where last week’s practice can help: Pause. Notice. Feel. Nurture. Let go.

The point is to notice, oh wow, this is what I’m holding onto. This is the story I’ve been telling myself. No wonder everything feels heavier than it needs to.

You could use a small rock to help you notice. (I find plenty on my walks, and I’m happy to share them with you. 🙂 Or maybe it’s a sticky note, a journal page, or even just your hand on your heart when the thought machine starts streaming again.

The practice is simply to pause, then notice long enough to ask, “Is this true right now? Or is this a story I keep carrying?”

And then, if you need to, feel it, nurture yourself, and see if you can put it down just for this breath, or long enough to feel your feet on the ground, notice where you are, and come back into the room you’re actually standing in.

That’s the real practice. Notice the weight of all those things in your head that you’re carrying. Then have the courage to tell the truth, and choose, even for a day, an hour, a minute, or a second, not to pick it back up.

Hands at your back.
Always,

Shannon

—————————————————————————————————-

P.S.S. Want to pick my brain about mindset, messaging, and marketing? Click here to schedule some free time with me, my gift for the next few weeks.

P.S. S.S. Whenever You’re Ready: Here are 3 Ways I can make an impact on creating greater success in your business using marketing that’s aligned with your mission and values without feeling like you’re selling your soul.

1. Make Money Now Sheet – It’s one of the bonuses in my 7-Step Soulful Marketing System. I wanted to give it to you for free to help you create more success.

2. Love Books Like I Do? – I’m always reviewing the best nonfiction books – Where Buddha Meets Business.

3. Get my proven 7-Step Soulful Marketing System. It gives you the framework you need to implement authentic and connected marketing using online customer experiences and launching your products, services, or courses. It will help you create greater success.

It’s a simple system, especially if you love to read like me. There’s no video or audio. Plus, you get my proven templates, tools, and worksheets, all with tremendous value. And I’m pricing it incredibly low so it can be more accessible to more people. 🙂

Did someone forward this to you? If so, get this eNewsletter regularly with my compliments by clicking this link. And if you’re in the mood to share, simply send this URL to others: https://www.soulfulmarketingsystem.com/soulful-marketing-enewsletter.

I appreciate your sharing. Thank you!

Some legalese: Copyright © 2025 SoulfulMarketing.com All rights reserved. SoulfulMarketing.com is a division of McCaffery Communications LLC. All rights reserved. You may forward this to others. Yet, no reproducing, republishing in any other form or by any other means without written permission.

Let’s Connect on Social Media!
Facebook

Instagram